Only Fans (Punk/Rock) - Video

Song: Only Fans (Punk/Rock)

An energetic and humorous heavy metal/hard rock track about a guy discovering his girlfriend's new online business venture in the most unexpected way.

Created with Suno AI.

Socials:

https://www.youtube.com/@JRA70
https://www.tiktok.com/@aeye.musix

Lyrics:

Hey!
Wait a minute!
Who sold my girl's pictures online?
What?!
OnlyFans?
I thought that was a fan store!

I came home Tuesday, something smelled wrong
My girl was online and the Wi-Fi was strong
She said, "Honey, don't worry, it's just my new thing"
Then my phone started buzzing like a microwave ring
I found OnlyFans, no breeze in the room
No ceiling fan spinning, no air of perfume
Just pictures and videos, pay-per-view style
I stared at the screen for a very long while

OnlyFans, what a shock!
OnlyFans, check the clock!
I thought it was cooling, but what did I find?
My girl's got a business and I've lost my mind!
OnlyFans, ca shing!
Who knew that was a thing?
She's taking healthy fruit
While I'm losing my cool!
She's making more money
Than I ever did at school!

Then I found the condom package sitting in the drawer
Looked at the label—buddy, that ain't yours!
Wrong size, wrong brand, wrong everything
I threw it in the trash like a malfunctioning thing
Then the satisfier looked terribly pleased
Sitting on the shelf like it had just been released
I said, "Why are you smiling?" It didn't reply
But somehow that gadget looked me straight in the eye
I yelled, "What the fuck?!" That's not right
I looked at a picture of a beaver and it give me a fright
Saw her spread eagle on the bed tonight
I said, "Honey, what is this?"
She said, "Oh, just shut up and keep on the light!"

OnlyFans, OnlyFans, what a shock!
OnlyFans, check the clock!
I thought it was cooling, but what did I find?
My girl's got a business and I've lost my mind!

Healthy fruit, healthy fruit
Banana, apple, pear
Now she's wearing very different underwear
I'm not jealous, I'm confused
I'm just feeling used!

OnlyFans, now I know!
OnlyFans, here we go!
She's selling little videos, making money overnight
She's taking healthy fruit underneath the neon light

Well, my girl just winked and said:
"Baby, subscribe!"
Yeah, right!
Yeah Right!

HEALTHY FRUIT!
ONLY FANS!
STUFFED BEAVER!
WRONG-SIZE RUBBER!
SATISFYER!
SPREAD EAGLE!

I’M SLEEPING ON THE COUCH TONIGHT!

Damn